Preferences and desires

Pastor Aldin showed me a book today that is entitled, "I Am A Church Member," By Thom Rainer.

We have decided to give the small book away to all of our new members (we will be recognizing our new members on December 8th - those are always exciting times!).

One of the chapters is entitled:

I will not let my church be about my preferences and desires.

Let me summarize the chapter for you.

Thom Rainer starts out by giving an illustration about his boys - when the were little -  fussing and fighting because they wanted something their way - without compromise.  You can't be around any group of small children without selfishness coming to the forefront.  Kids can be selfish brats at times.

Go back to the disciples of Jesus who had a tendency to fight with one another.  On one occasion (In Mark 9), the 12 were arguing about who was the greatest.- like spoiled children.

Thom Rainer writes, "Christians can sometimes act just like those demanding children who want things their way.  Temper tantrums in churches may not include church members lying on the floor kicking and screaming, but some come close.  But the strange thing about church membership is that you actually give up your preferences when you join.  Don't get me wrong; there may be much about your church that you like a lot.  But you are there to meet the needs of others.  You are there to serve others.  You are there to give.  You are there to sacrifice."

He writes, "get the picture?"

Instead of demanding our preferences, our desires and the way "we've always done it," Rainer writes that we are called to serve.  He writes, "we will never find joy in church membership when we are constantly seeking things our way.  But paradoxically, we will find the greatest joy when we choose to be last.....True joy means giving up our rights and preferences and serving everyone else."

Good stuff.  Challenging thoughts for all of us.

Jesus said in Mark 9:35, "If anyone wants to be first, he must be last of all and servant of all."

What are some of the characteristics of an "inward focused church?"

Again from the book.  Thom Rainer's research team conducted a survey of churches that were inwardly focused.  For the most part, they were not serving past their own walls and their own members. 

In other words, they were largely self-serving.

Here are the results of their survey.  The ten dominant behavior patterns of members in these inward focused churches (and I summarize what he wrote):

1. Worship wars.  Factions in the church wan the music just the way they like it.  Any deviation is met with anger and demands for change.

2.  Prolonged minutia meetings.  The church spends an inordinate amount of time in different meetings.  Most of the meetings deal with the most inconsequential items, while the Great Commission and Great Commandment are rarely the topics of discussion.

3.  Facility focus.  The church facilities develop iconic status.   One of the highest priorities in the church is the protection and preservation of the church's building and grounds.

4.  Program driven.  The problem develops when the program becomes an end instead of a means to greater ministry.

5.  Inwardly focused budget.  A disproportionate share of the budget is used to meet the needs and comforts of the members instead of reaching beyond the walls of the church.

6.  Inordinate demands for pastoral care.

7.  Attitudes of entitlement.  Demanding special treatment.

8.  Greater concern about change than the gospel.  Rainer writes, "Almost any noticeable changes in the church evoke the ire of many; but those same passions are not evident about participating in the work of the gospel to change lives.

9.  Anger and hostility.  Members are consistently angry.  They regularly express hostility toward the church staff and other members.

10.  Evangelistic apathy.  Very few members share their faith on a regular basis.

Wow.

Paul writes that we are to have the mind of Christ (Philippians 2:5).

We are to be servants.  We are to be obedient.  We are to put others first.  We are to do whatever it takes to keep the unity of the church.  We will not let our church be about us - but others.

I will not let my church be about my preferences and desires.

Just some thoughts for a Thursday.