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Thursday, February 05, 2015

Undivided attention

In this season of our lives, Debbie and I are very strong relationally.
The "empty nest" syndrome of negativity did not really hit us too hard - and here is why:
Before our children left the house - Debbie and I learned to be together, without our children.  Without friends.  Without family.  We genuinely like each other and enjoy having fun together.
Here's a marriage principle:  To improve your marriage, couples must schedule time together - time to give each other their undivided attention.
Friends and family should not be present during this time.
It must be planned.
One suggestion for planning this is to sit down every Sunday afternoon and schedule, yes, actually schedule a time to be together during the week - at such and such a time.  Put it on your calendar.  Don't let anything take you away from that time - outside of an actual emergency.
Debbie and I have a "date night" every Friday evening (being "empty nesters" it is not hard to do).
During your time together, create activities that will meet the needs of your spouse (which we will talk about on Sunday). 
Your time together is too important to the security of your marriage to neglect.
Now then, before I go, understand this:  Spending time together will not automatically draw you closer (that's why the time spent must be quality as well as quantity) but your marriage will not succeed unless you do spend time together with one another - alone - no kids - no in-laws - no friends - each week, if not each day.
Just a thought for a Thursday.

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