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Thursday, August 27, 2015

Marrying the wrong person

I would surmise that there might be someone(s) - reading this - who feel like that did not marry the right person.

It was "false advertising" when they first met.

What attracted you to them is now causing you to attack them in a way that borders on the absurd.

You know that the Bible hates divorce and that God wants you to stay married - but what do  you do when it simply is not working?

Well, I obviously don't have all the answers - but let me offer you some suggestions:

Take responsibility for your own actions. 

Paul tells us in Galatians 6:5, "Each person must be responsible for himself."

That means I must take responsibility for my marriage and not blame other people - that I am committing myself to be a part of the solution and not continue to be a part of the problem.

Some blaming your spouse for your "bad" marriage.  You can not "fix" the marriage if you are always projecting blame.
Stop giving the majority of your prayer energy in praying for God to change your spouse - and start asking God to change you!
I can't be responsible for what my spouse thinks, says and does - but I can be responsible for myself - that I will continue to act and think and speak in a godly way.
Do enlist the help of the Holy Spirit!

With the help of the Holy Spirit - know that your marriage can change.

God hasn't given up on your marriage - why should you?

Jesus said in Matthew 19:26, "Humanly speaking it is impossible - but nothing is impossible with God."

Did you know that the word "impossible" is not in God's vocabulary?

By faith, believe that your marriage can become better - even in a marriage - or I should say especially in a marriage where you think you married the wrong person.

We vastly underestimate what the Holy Spirit can do.

If God can raise Jesus from the dead - He can raise up a dead marriage relationship and restore, yes I said, restore your marriage to where "it used to be."

He can renew your love for one another.

Know that commitment is a choice.

I choose to be committed.

Paul tells us in Galatians 6:9, "Don't get tired of doing what is good and don't get discouraged and give up."

Good marriages (especially the ones where you think you married badly) take a lot of effort.  Roll up your sleeves and work at it type thing.

Remember:  You act your way into a feeling.  You don't feel your way into an action.  If you start acting nice to your spouse, you are going to start feeling nice.

If you act loving toward your spouse, you will start feeling love again toward him or her.

Forgive, forgive, forgive.

Did I say to forgive?

Ask for forgiveness and offer forgiveness.  Admit your faults.  Walk in grace.  Let it go.

So what do you do if you think your married the wrong person?  Or married for the wrong reason?

Get a divorce?  God says, "No".

God says to you today, "stay with the one you've married and I will change you and if possible, I will change that person if they will let me and I will make your marriage a miracle!"
Do you believe in miracles?  I do!
And let me leave you with this (and I can write so  much more):  God can always bring plan A results out of our plan B decision (or our plan C,D,E and F decisions).

Just a thought for a Thursday.

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