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Thursday, December 04, 2008

forgiveness and letting go

Here's what I know: forgiveness releases us.

Somehow we think that when we withhold forgiveness from someone that we are hurting the other person when it reality it is we who are suffering.

We build up walls in saying, "I'm never going to allow myself to be hurt again." "They've gone too far." And so we find ourselves withdrawing from participation in a marriage, in kingdom work or in any other kind of relationship that we are involved in.

Let me remind you: the alternative to forgiveness is bitterness and resentment.

I am passionate about not ending up my time on this planet as a bitter, resentful old man.

Dale Carnegie tells about a visit to Yellowstone Park where he saw a grizzly bear. The huge animal was in the center of a clearing, feeding on some discarded camp food. For several minutes he feasted alone; no other creature dared draw near. After a few moments a skunk walked through the meadow toward the food and took his place next to the grizzly. The bear didn't object and Carnegie knew why. "The grizzly," he said, "knew the high cost of getting even."

People who refuse to forgive, hurt themselves. Bitter people are no fun to be around. They can't sleep. Ulcers line their stomach. Their blood pressure rises. They see the negative in every situation because their life is polluted with these feelings of resentment and anger.

Again: People who are unwilling to forgive may feel that they are punishing the other person but the only person paying the price is themselves.

In the book, Understanding forgiveness," by Robert Harvey and David Benner, they write, "Try a simple experiment on yourself. Make a fist and hold it tight. One minute of this is sufficient to bring discomfort. Consider what would happen if the fist were maintained in that state of tension during a period that extended into weeks, months, or even years. Obvious it would soon become a sick member of the body.

You may hurt a person by not forgiving them and thus feel some satisfying sense of getting even, but almost without exception, the hurt you do to yourself may be even greater. After a while you may not feel the pain of the clenched resentment in your soul, but its self-inflicted paralysis will have its effect upon your whole life."

Forgiveness not only releases us physically and emotionally, it also releases us SPIRITUALLY. One of the greatest barriers to effective prayer and spiritual vitality is an unforgiving heart.

DL Moody wrote, "I believe [unforgiveness] is keeping more people from having power with God than any other thing -- they are not willing to cultivate the spirit of forgiveness. If we allow the root of bitterness to spring up in our hearts against someone, our prayer will not be answered. It may not be an easy thing to live in sweet fellowship with all those with whom we come in contact; but that is what the grace of God is given to us for."

An unforgiving heart binds up and blocks the Holy Spirit's ability to work. It becomes a barrier to effective and fruitful ministry. An unwillingness to forgive disrupts our fellowship with God. It steals from us the joy of knowing His forgiveness in our lives. Are you having trouble praying with power?

Is your walk with God in a rut? Has it been a long time since you have felt the presence of God?

Could it be that there is someone you need to forgive? Do you need to "let it go"?

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